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Tamara / 21 / Weinheim
Ich bin ein verträumter Mensch der hinter Oberflächen schaut.
Ein Wunder ist nur, was wir dazu machen.
Das Leben ist spannend und vielseitig und ich versuche
dieses mit Foto und Text hier festzuhalten.
Denn die Erinnerung ist das einzige Paradies
aus dem wir noch nicht vertrieben wurden.

My world became something, I currently don't want to live in anymore.
Since the day I've met you first, I'm falling for you.
I've never stopped loving you, even if I had you once, but lost you so quickly.

I can't change my feelings, but the same way I can't change them,
I cant push them away, nor deny them.
It's hard for me to accept it, to move on with a lie,
which is pulsating and living in my chest.

It bursts me, it drives me mad,
and with every passing day it leads me to a place
at which I've never wanted to be at.
The train. The night. The triangle lights.

I love you, I love you so much that I'd rather kill myself than seeing you dead.
I'd give you so much, I'd give you everything I have but...
I'm just not the one who is made for you, am I?

I'm drowning myself in a fictive world.
I can be with you there, I can kiss, even touch and sleep with you.
But with every real worde we change, my heart gets ill,
it's getting sick.

If I'd confess my feelings to you, it would end in a mess.
Maybe the mess would be SO big, that it ruins everything we ever had.
Everything we currently have.
And this means at the same time so much to me that I don't want to loose it,
and so less to me, that it sucks so badly to move on this way.

I need you, right here, right now.
To watch your face for hours while you sleep.
To listen to your voice, no matter what it's saying.
To listen to your breath in darkness.
To give my life to you.

But all I can do is chatting, roleplaying.
And I'll move on this way.
And everytime Kazuki whispers against Kouyou's lips
The three words I'd want to hear from you so badly,
I'm sitting here, not able to stop my fucking tears.

That's all I wanted to say.

You know me so much,
but still too less,
to read this dumbfucking blog.
I've lost so many words here about you...
You never saw a single one.

I love you.
I always will.
Even if I have to love you like a sister.

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